Have you noticed that talking to people is hard nowadays?
Once you go outside, you see people staring at their smartphones or listening to music with their headphones. It looks like everyone is busy!
Another thing that’s becoming a trend is that people have a shorter attention span. It means you’ll have a difficult time starting a conversation.
I know that some of you are already on Tinder, Bumble, or any other dating sites. Social media also make talking with anyone more accessible and more exciting.
Talking to a boy can be manageable or daunting. If you’re a shy girl with a small number of friends, starting a conversation with a boy can be nerve-wracking.
No, I am not talking about a child who looks like he comes straight from puberty. No, we are talking about a possible boyfriend material.
Even confident women are finding it hard to make a conversation with the guy they admire.
Let’s admit it! Guys prefer girls who are popular and fun . It’s an advantage if you’re one of these girls. What if you aren’t one of them?
Maybe you’re wondering how to talk to a boy?
14 Tips For Starting the Conversation
I listed down these tips on how to talk to a boy. Trust me. Once you use these strategies, you can talk not just to guys but to anyone.
Being confident is your first step. No matter how nervous or timid you are, you have to gain confidence.
If you aren’t confident yet, you can pretend that you’re sure of yourself. Once you begin to talk, you’ll feel more relaxed- and the confidence will present itself. It is like faking it until you make it.
Being too nervous can make a guy receive the wrong vibe. You don’t have to be a relationship expert to know this. Stay relaxed and take a deep breath.
Put in mind that confidence can make or break your conversation.
Once you build your confidence, it’s time now to make your move. How can you talk to a man if you won’t approach him, right?
There’s no reason to be shy or awkward about it. Summon the courage to move next to him.
You may need to conduct a little research. Find out if the two of you have a shared interest. This will make your approach more natural.
Use an Ice Breaker
Before approaching a boy, you can use ice breakers like “Hey, I love your shirt!” or ask him about the time.
There are several conversation topics under the sun. There is no need to jump right into personal questions territory. A great conversation starter, however, will depend on his personality. So, you may want to dig a little without being stalker-y.
Find Common Ground
Finding your common interests is a good starter. Once you’ve learned a guy’s hobbies and interests, you can keep the talk flowing.
Steering the conversation on topics that interests both of you makes the talk smoother. He’ll be more engaged in the conversation if the topic interests him.
Finding common interests develops the connection. It’s also a great chance to know his likes and dislikes.
Put on Your Best Smile
I’m sure that you aren’t comfortable talking to an uninviting or dull person.
Smiling is a fantastic idea!
Smiling gives a man the signal that you’re an engaging and fun girl. The act of smiling tends to make the one you’re talking to answer in the same manner.
When talking to him, smile often and giggle when he’s throwing jokes. Show your crush the twinkle in your eyes. How can you even successfully flirt if you don’t know how to work your pearly whites.
No man can resist a woman’s gorgeous smile!
Since the beginning, boys like demure women. Use cute expressions and twirl your hair when talking.
These gestures make you so lovable and graceful. Revealing your emotion is also a good thing. You don’t want to come across as an ice princess.
Take note that most boys are turned off by girls who use vulgar language. Avoid telling negative comments about your coworkers or bystanders too. If you act gracefully, you will not just be attractive to a teenage boy or a young man. Instead, you have made a mark as a mature woman who can be attractive to the opposite sex and a good companion to the rest.
You are miss congeniality, basically.
Fill the Silence
If you find yourself stalling, don’t panic. A guy may initiate to break the silence by talking about random stuff. This may bring back the momentum in the conversation.
Wait for the right time to break the silence.
Be a Good Listener
If you’re nervous or too excited, chances are you’ll find yourself speaking all the time. Put in mind that boys prefer girls who listen to them.
Allow him to engage in the conversation and listen to what he’s saying.
It does not mean that the spotlight will only be on him. If you begin his animated monologue with an intriguing open ended question, you may have just found the fountain of all great conversation with him.
Let him Talk
All of us want to talk about ourselves to some degree.
Allow a guy to talk about himself, then respond. This will provide two benefits, one to charge his hero instinct and second, this enables you to get to know him a little.
He may tell you stories about his past or future goals. He may also share stories about work or school. Fairy tale romantic relationships seem to begin with the boy regaling the girl about what he can do for her. Just how good is he as a story teller?
By stepping aside, you can also gauge his character. Will he willingly step aside so that you can also talk about yourself? If he does so willingly, without you interrupting, then it may just be the beginning of a good relationship.
Telling a funny story is an effective way to make a man stick around. It may get both of you at ease.
This is also an exceptional way to initiate a conversation.
Making him laugh may encourage him to continue speaking with you for a long time. Of course, it would be a fun thing to find out he shares your sense of humor. Wouldn’t it be awesome if he responds to this banter, without missing a beat?
Even the most distinguished looking man can look like a young boy when he is having the time of his life. Don’t you want to see him smile?
Who doesn’t enjoy being praised? Complimenting him about something guarantees that he’ll respond with a smile.
Start with complimenting him about his shirt, shoes, or watch.
In most cases, a conversation between people begins without even mentioning their names. By the time you approach a boy, start introducing yourself and tell him that you wanted to have a conversation with him.
Doing this requires strong confidence. Make sure to do it with your best smile and maintain eye contact.
Share Something About Yourself
I know that you want to get to know him more. However, asking him too many questions can look like you’re interrogating him.
A guy may feel he’s in the hot seat. He may feel uncomfortable if it continues for an extended period.
To avoid this, share some information about you. This will help him to feel calm and he may encourage you to tell more.
Both of you may find other subjects as the conversation flows. Doing this gets rid of the awkward atmosphere. If you are lucky, the initial conversation can lead to texting. Texting should be secondary, really. You want to be able to gauge the type of emotion he usually tends to engage in.
Be wary of Body Language
The way your body moves while talking to a guy affects the whole conversation. Back up your words with body language.
Smiling, having eye contact, and leaning in are effective ways to show that you’re interested.
Avoid tapping your fingers and feet unless there’s music playing. Try not to glance at your watch or phone from time to time as well.
These actions indicate impatience and send the signal that you’re not interested in what he’s saying.
What Topics Can You Talk About With A Boy?
Now that you know how to talk to a boy, I come up with 12 topics you can bring up.
Every man has different traits, so you have to pick questions you think suits best. Sometimes, a question that you think is not interesting can make the guy talk more.
Trying out different questions is worth a shot.
It’s not important whether you’re sporty or not. Most guys are into sports , so he may feel great that he met a woman who is the same.
If the two of you support rival teams, you may start discussing who’s the better player or team.
Make sure not to allow your emotions to get the best of you. This may bring the conversation on the wrong path.
If you’re at the point where you’re running out of questions, you may talk about the weather. I know that this may appear boring or dull, but it can do the job.
Begin by complaining that it’s too hot or too cold. If there’s heavy rain, you may offer him your umbrella or ask him to allow you to share his umbrella with you.
Aside from this, you can talk about your favorite holiday or season. You may even know when his birthday is!
Education is an excellent topic. There’s a huge chance that both of you are in the same field.
Start by asking about his school or college course. Ask him about his schedule or favorite subject.
If the guy is not studying anymore, you can ask where did he attend school. This is a great way to know his field of expertise.
When discussing work-related subjects , never ask the guy about his earnings. Doing this can send him the signal that you’re a gold digger.
Ask him where does he work and his duty.
Is this his dream job? He’s been part of the company for how many years?
Ask any of his hobbies. It might be golf, cooking, photography, or anything. Chances are he’ll feel happy to share them with you. Ask him how did he learn it or how long has he been doing it.
If you want to level up your connection, ask him if you can accompany him in his hobby. He’ll be shocked and form some questions about why you want to join him.
Talking about food is classic. Everyone wants to talk about it!
Is he health conscious or not? Does he like fancy restaurants or home-cooked meals?
Ask his favorite food or if he cooks. Take a step further by saying that you want to cook for him.
Most boys have a specific goal in mind. It’s a great idea to discuss them.
He’ll feel great to open up about it. If he learns that you motivate him, he may decide to keep you with him.
Boys don’t talk about their goals often. He may grab this chance to share them with someone.
The guy will stay close if he knows that you’re someone he can lean on.
One of the things that you can ask him is if he loves pets. If yes, ask him if he prefers a dog or a cat.
If not, ask him if he’s willing to have one. When he was growing up, ask him if he grew up with pets.
If both of you are pet lovers, show him a photo of your pet. He may show you his pet too!
Almost every one of us has social media accounts. It’s unlikely he doesn’t have one.
Whether it’s on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, try to connect with him. Once you take a look at his social media profile, you’ll have an idea of what types of content he shares or likes.
Seeing his photos or life updates is an excellent way to get to know him more.
Movies and Television shows
Who doesn’t watch Netflix?
Get to know this favorite movie, TV series, actor, and actress. What movie genre does he prefer?
This is a great way to know what entertains him.
I know that one of the things you want to ask him is if he’s single or not.
You want to find out if both of you can take it to the next level. You want to know if he matches your taste.
Also, you want to know if you have similar views about romance and relationships.
Is he looking for a partner or prefer to stay single? What happened to his previous relationships?
Obviously, you can’t ask him these intriguing questions right away. Don’t expect to get a detailed answer, especially about his past relationships.
Well, there are unique ways of how you can ask these questions. It all boils down to the atmosphere and how you’ll ask them.
If there’s a topic that can make every guy focus and listen, it’s sex.
Take note that this can be a sensitive topic for men, so have the right approach.
Asking questions about sex may seem off, especially if you’re talking to someone you’re not close to. But who knows, it may add some spice to your conversation.
Also, talking about sex gives him the idea that you’re vocal about this topic.
Talking to someone, especially to strangers, isn’t as challenging as others think. You have to be interesting and interested and keep the conversation going.
Once you follow the steps I mentioned above, you’ll be able to talk with a boy or to anyone.
Prepare yourself if things didn’t work out the way you want it to happen. Doing it for the first time is a huge step to train yourself to have a conversation with a boy.
If he’s not reciprocating your enthusiasm, don’t feel bad. At this point, you can determine if your chit-chat should go on any further or you aren’t a good match.
With practice, I’m sure you’ll discover the right approach along the way.
Sometimes, you just need a little nudge. So, consider investing in Infatuation Scripts by Clayton Max.
These scripts will not tell you exactly what to say. Your conversation should flow naturally. However, they will give you guides for the appropriate situations. You will have an idea as to what type of conversation works best for your every goal.
Don’t mind the term “infatuation“. This is just the beginning. You need to take hold of your crush on his favorite thing. Later on, you can make it bloom into true love.