If you’re a guy, you may think it’s a mystery how others can easily talk to girls. As a result, you’re clueless about how to strike up a conversation with a beautiful woman you like.
You may struggle and think you’re not a great conversation starter. You’re nervous around girls.
You’re not alone. Many guys are like you, and they’re shy around attractive girls.
If you’re wondering how to catch the attention of the pretty girl you like, kindly read on to learn the top tips that will boost your confidence.
17 Tips to Talk to Girls
1. Just Do It
It’s okay to hesitate and think it’s scary talking to girls. However, acknowledging your social anxiety around them is a start.
You get sweaty hands and wobbly knees just by thinking about starting a conversation with an attractive woman you like.
Don’t worry. Just talk to the young girl, and you’ll get better in time.
2. Declare Your Clear Intentions
Be a man and state your intentions. Beating around the bush won’t do the trick.
Go to her and ask her for a date. Tell her you want to spend time with her.
Inquire about what she wants to do and where she prefers to go. Then, of course, ensure that whatever you decide should be within your budget.
3. Create a Personal Connection With Her
You can attract women with charm and wit, but you should first develop an instant connection with the beautiful girl.
You should actively listen to find a personal connection. For instance, you may discover that you lived in the same neighborhood or like the same cola brand.
A remote connection can be an icebreaker and instant bond. The random girl will remember you and the conversation she had with you.
However, you may find it hard to have an initial conversation, but with a personal connection, you can overcome the awkward moment.
4. Rejection is Fine
Rejection is possible, but if you don’t try, you won’t know. If you don’t find the answer, you’ll keep on wondering.
Therefore, go and have a small talk with the girl. If she rejects you, you’ll be fine. Move on.
5. Use Technology
You can ask a girl for a date in several ways. First, you can approach and ask her.
You may also get the woman’s number and call. Moreover, you may also send her a text message.
Technology can also help you communicate with her after setting the date.
6. Solidify Your Plans
Instead of using text messaging to stay on top of the girl’s mind, you can send messages to inform her of your plans.
This way, the girl gets excited about spending some time with you. Don’t forget to tell her the place and time.
Moreover, send the woman a message when you’re on your way to pick her up.
7. Hug Her
When you see the girl, please give her a friendly hug to keep her at ease and comfortable.
8. Ask Questions
It’s hard to make a conversation; therefore, you can ask the girl some questions instead.
You should focus the conversation on the girl. Ask her what she thinks and likes.
However, avoid topics involving money, shitty friends, ex-husbands, and ex-boyfriends.
9. Use Body Language
You should also focus on the girl’s body language because she understands your body signals.
Therefore, if you’re using the correct body language, the girl probably responds positively to your request for a date.
Even if you have an incredible physique and looks, the girl won’t say yes if you’re not showing the correct body language.
10. Recommend Something
Don’t be arrogant, but give friendly recommendations, depending on your conversation with her.
For instance, if she mentions a song she likes, you may recommend another song or band with a similar genre.
Of course, you need to know many things to make excellent recommendations.
You should find a way to weave the recommendations into your conversations for the girl to remember you.
11. Compliment Her
It’s natural to have an awkward silence in any conversation; therefore, if it happens, you should provide a genuine compliment to your girl.
However, don’t gush about her eyes or hair. Instead, you should tell her that you like her dress or how she laughs.
You score bonus points when you compliment a girl because it tells her that you pay attention to her.
12. Ask What-If Questions
If you ask hypothetical questions, you open the door to many possibilities and follow-up questions.
However, be ready to ask fundamental questions with your what-if questions.
For instance, you may ask what the girl will do with a million dollars; then, you can ask what’s the most expensive thing she bought.
13. Talk About Her Career
Women love to talk about their careers, even if they hate their jobs. So they’ll endlessly talk about what they do for a living.
You should give her a chance to tell her story, and for sure, she’ll remember you because it’s always an excellent conversation for her to talk about her work.
14. Be Honest
Sometimes, the girl will talk about something you don’t know. You should be honest about not knowing an essential thing about the topic.
Refrain from being opinionated and arrogant. Instead, you can ask the girl some questions and show interest in something you can learn from her.
You can tell the girl that you don’t know what she’s talking about, but you’re ready to learn.
15. Keep Comfortable and Confident With the Silence
What should you do when there’s a hush in the conversation? Many people feel uncomfortable with silence.
However, you can be comfortable and confident about silence when talking with a girl. You’ll be surprised what you’re going to speak about next.
Give the girl time to breathe and think about what she wants to talk about next. Moreover, silence also gives you time to do the same.
Use silence to your advantage. Don’t be uncomfortable with it.
16. Don’t Talk About Tough Topics
If it’s your initial conversation with a girl, don’t talk about controversial subjects, such as politics, because you don’t know her political philosophy.
Moreover, you barely know her; your topics should be pleasant and fun.
17. Learn to Acknowledge a Great Conversation
Tell the girl that you’re having a great conversation with her. You may not realize how your date is going along; therefore, tell her you’re having a grand time.
Moreover, you can use it as a conversation filler. Moreover, don’t be afraid to ask the girl what she wants to talk about next.
The endless possibilities will keep your conversation going. So, therefore, don’t believe you don’t have anything to say to a girl.
Top Topics to Discuss with a Girl
Do you think it’s a nightmare to talk to a girl? Don’t fret because here are topics you can discuss when you ask her for a date.
You can talk about the people, culture, landscape, opportunities, history, the future, and landmarks.
You and the girl will talk for hours if you decide to talk about your community. Moreover, you have the opportunity to dig deeper and unravel what you have in common with her.
You should allow the girl to talk about herself and ask her questions to understand her.
You may ask about her hobbies and why she started with them. Find out why she thinks her hobbies are interesting.
Asking questions can help keep a conversation going with the girl; she likes it if you ask questions.
You can talk about the DJ or band if you’re in a bar. You may even talk about the genre of music that’s playing.
Music is an excellent topic. You may even get her to talk about the lullabies her mom sang when she was just a toddler.
You can exchange stories about your experiences. Talk about what you love and hate.
You should create a space where you and the girl can freely talk about life.
You can talk about your jobs. Ask the girl if she likes her job. You may also discuss her career aspirations, choices, journeys, and paths.
You may also talk about your learning experiences, old superiors, and the worst day at work. Finally, ask her how she chose her career.
Girls prefer family-centered men; therefore, you can talk about how close you are to your family.
Share stories about your parents and crazy siblings. Talk about celebrations with your family.
Everyone has their favorite movies, and even if you have different choices about movie genres, the girl can talk about the most memorable films she watched.
Moreover, you can talk about your favorite movie stars and all other experiences of watching a movie.
Avoid These Pitfalls When You Talk to a Girl
You may try to impress a girl, but unfortunately, you get the opposite effect.
If you talk to a woman you like, avoid these actions:
- Being too cocky
- Being too nice
- Being cold
- Being too polite
- Trying hard to be confident
- Trying hard to be smart
You should also be cautious about committing these mistakes:
Trying Hard to Show You’re Worthy of Her Attention
Putting the girl on a pedestal is an unattractive mindset. Every action you do becomes repulsive if you always try to prove your worthiness.
You’re worthy by default. You should focus on determining if the woman you like is worthwhile.
A change in mindset makes you have regular conversations with the girl. You gain more confidence.
Trying too Hard to be Exciting or Funny
Inexperienced men believe their conversation should be exciting or fun, but they forget that these types of talks can be uncomfortable, awkward, or weird.
If the girl feels uncomfortable, you can’t get her to like you, even if you have an entertaining topic.
It’s vital that your girl feels relaxed and comfortable with you; therefore, you should strive to have a normal conversation.
Trying to be Mysterious or Alpha
Don’t try to show alpha behavior because the girl will think you’re insincere and fake. It would help if you didn’t portray yourself as somebody else because she knows you’re not yourself.
Moreover, if you go for the mysterious effect, the girl thinks you’re weird.
What you should do is focus on having a relaxed and everyday conversation. Of course, girls want to have enjoyable conversations with men.
You become more attractive and confident if you don’t pretend to be someone else.
Declaring your Feelings or Love Too Early
You shouldn’t tell her how you feel too early. But, on the other hand, you should first determine her feelings toward you.
Many men tell the girl they like about their feelings and blow their chances away because she feels pressured to reciprocate.
If she doesn’t have intense feelings for you yet, she doesn’t want the pressure; therefore, she’ll only say no.
What to Do to Overcome Your Nervousness Around a Girl
If you’re nervous, you tend to freeze up when you begin talking to a woman you like. However, it gets worse if she’s your crush.
Here are some reasons why you’re nervous when you talk to a girl:
- Fear of rejection
- Inexperience in talking to the opposite sex
- Self-consciousness around the girl you like
- So much is at stake
Here are some tips to overcome your shyness and nervousness:
Focus on the Girl
You should focus on getting to know the girl, what she wants, what she says, and how she feels.
Instead of focusing on your self-consciousness and nervousness, you’ll notice them disappear before you shift your attention to the girl you like.
Remember That Being Nervous is Also Good.
Tension and intensity emanate from nervousness, which can produce chemistry with the girl.
For instance, a tiny bit of shaking in your voice helps produce a genuine and exciting interaction. It shows that the girl means something to you.
Nervousness tells your body to prepare for a challenging situation, making you wittier and more creative.
Once you realize your nervousness can help you, you no longer become afraid of it.
Even if you’re a shy guy, you should do something. You should begin a conversation with a woman you like, even if your voice quivers.
It’s good to be nervous and do what you’re afraid to do because you conquer your fear by your action.
Your fear makes you do something, and it makes you grow as a person.
What’s the Next Step when You Talk to a Girl
What will be your next step if you have already initiated a conversation with a girl?
Here are some suggestions about your next steps with a girl you like:
Time Your Next Step
You may enjoy entertaining and talking to the girl you like. You forget about planning the next step.
You should always take the initiative of asking her out. However, how will you know if you’re taking the next step?
The right time if you’re having a great time with each other, and both of you feel a connection.
Ways to Know if a Girl Also Likes You
You’ll know if a girl also likes you with these signs:
- She laughs even at your bad jokes
- She adds you on social media and even likes your posts
- She tells you about her friends and family
- She flirts or is playful with you
- She maintains eye contact with you longer
- She touches you lightly as you speak
- She’s shy when you’re with her
- She’s more attentive to you
If you notice these things, you know she also likes you; therefore, you can take the following steps.
Ways to Beat the Feeling of Rejection
If it’s your first time talking to a girl you like, it’s normal to fear rejection. You worry that no other woman will like you if this girl rejects you.
It would be best if you also considered that women have the same fear. Therefore, if you don’t take your chances, nothing will happen.
Girls are shy and won’t take the initiative. You should be aware of your fear of rejection to beat it.
You must overcome your boundaries and tell your intention to the girl you like. If you don’t risk rejection, you won’t get what you want.
Even if you get rejected, you still win because you took the risk. Every rejection means you overcome your fear and gain more experience talking to women.
Rejection may come from an unanswered text message or a semi-awkward conversation, but you should move on.
How Many Times Should You Talk to a Girl?
You should strike a balance in deciding how often you should contact a girl. You should follow two principles about balance.
First, you shouldn’t wait long before you decide to talk to the girl again because she’ll assume you’re not interested in her. She may also forget about you.
You want the girl to remember you, but you shouldn’t be too intense and eager. If you’re too enthusiastic, she’ll think you have nothing else to do with your life but to pursue her.
Therefore, you should also consider the second principle, giving the girl the space and time to develop her feelings.
Allow the girl to look forward to your call or message. Give her time to process your first conversation.
A good rule of thumb is to communicate with her two days after your initial conversation.
Tips for Talking and Impressing a Group of Girls
Your target is to impress a group of young people and make them talk about you even when you’re gone. So remember these essential points when you chat with them.
Have Fun with the Girls
Be positive. The girls should realize that you’re fun to be with, and they want to be with you.
On your end, you should feel excited and alive to spend time with girls. They should feel your joy and enthusiasm even if you only talk to them for a few minutes.
Stop Asking Awkward and Weird Questions
As with talking to a girl you like, don’t ask weird and awkward questions when you speak to a group of women.
You should charm them, and asking awkward questions make the women want to avoid you.
Get the Girls to Talk
Involve the girls in the conversation. Ask them questions or say something relatable to them.
Girls can participate in the conversation by adding their opinions. Moreover, they can create a conversation with one another.
Getting the girls to talk is an excellent way to get closer. Moreover, you can generate some healthy opinions and arguments if you talk about social media or music.
Since you’re initiating the conversation, the girls will think you’re an excellent conversationalist.
Humor is critical to make the girls closer to you immediately. You also make them lose their inhibitions.
You should learn to be witty and funny, and you won’t have problems getting women to like you. They will prefer to talk to you.
Win the Girls to Your Side
You’re an awkward man if you only focus on one girl while the other girls look bored because no one is talking to them.
On the other hand, you’re a great guy if you can make everyone feel like they’re the center of your attention.
If the girl you like is with a group of friends, you should ensure that you involve everyone in the conversation.
Moreover, making eye contact with all girls would be best because they’re your audience. You’ll eventually lose their attention if you lose one woman’s attention.
Be Likable and Warm
When talking to a group of girls, you should laugh wholeheartedly and smile. You should use self-deprecating humor at the start.
Women like a guy who can make fun of himself. However, don’t be neurotic because you’ll only look pathetic.
You should be cautious about naughty flirting because if you annoy a girl with your joke, you jeopardize the entire conversation.
However, talking naughty can elicit hysterical laughter, and you impress the girls. Therefore, you should learn how to use playful flirting.
The Body Language
You should sit upright or stand up tall when talking to the girls, but you should also observe their body language.
Learning to read body language is critical because it tells you more information than what the girls say.
Use the Girls to Impress the Girl You Like
Talk to all the girls, but don’t forget to flatter the one you like. Say something to her.
If the other girls notice, they may even become your unintentional wingmen to win the woman you like quickly.
Let the Girls Want to be with You Again
Learn when to walk away and leave the perfect impression. Don’t wait for the girls to lose interest.
Walk away when you realize that the girls still want to talk to you. If you leave them laughing and having fun, they’ll miss you immediately and want to be with you again.