10 Signs Of A Serial Dater (And How to Handle Them)

You’re on some dating apps and sites, but you often wonder why some people ghost you. They date you a few times, and you never hear from them again.

Are you to blame? Did you offend these people, so they don’t contact you again?

You’re not alone in your dilemma. Do many people often wonder why they lose contact with others? Why do some people ghost them?

Fortunately, you come across this article. There’s a term for people who ghost you – serial daters. So, kindly read on to learn about them.

What Is a Serial Dater?

You’re not alone if you don’t know what a serial dater is. These individuals fall in love with love and date many individuals in a short period.

Serial daters become a love addict. They enjoy the ‘chase’ of new connections and enjoy the initial date, but these individuals may go on second or third dates.  

These individuals stop talking to prospective mates as soon as they learn everything they can about them. 

It sounds like a fantastic thing to do, but being a ‘prospect’ for a serial dater is not much fun.

If you date a serial dater, you may end up heartbroken and bewildered. It appears to be an excellent relationship.

But when everything changes, you are left devastated.

When a serial dater ghosts you, everything changes for the worse. There are times when a natural split occurs and other times when you’re left wounded.

Serial Dater Types

1.    Pragmatic

The pragmatic person frequently seeks to experience the exhilaration of a brand-new relationship and the empowerment and sense of mastery that comes with it.

The pragmatic person constantly seeks that feeling in every new and short-lived romantic relationship, despite their overall preference for being single.

The Pragmatic person has essentially given up on true love, receiving satisfaction from these fleeting but extreme amounts of pleasure.

2. Semi-Romantic

People who are semi-romantic believe genuinely in soul mates and true love. They also think that it’s okay to date.

For them, they have the opportunity to play the numbers in the modern dating process. They have better chances of meeting the One if they meet and date more people.

How to Know if You’re Meeting a Serial Dater

1.    A Serial Dater Goes On a Very Casual Date.

It is usually difficult to spot a serial dater in the first place, especially on a first date. Still, this is a hint.

On a first date, people are supposed to act casually.

Serial daters, however, always act casually. They do not want to get to know you because they primarily seek “firsts.”

After your first date, they become harder to find. They may not respond to your telephone calls or messages, agree to things, and then not show up, or ghost people altogether.

You shouldn’t assume that someone’s casual behavior is a sign that they’re a serial dater just because they’re casual on a first date. A serial dater, however, is always calm.

Do the things you do with this person seem lackluster? It may be because serial daters want to put only a little effort into someone.

Every time you go on a date, it will be casual and unambitious. As a result, you may wonder whether or not the serial dater likes you.

2.    A Serial Dater Gets Physical Quickly.

People who serial date want to have physical intimacy with you as soon as possible. They enjoy closeness, and physical proximity is the most ideal.

However, regular folks aren’t going to press for cuddling on your first date. Serial daters always will.

Even before they’ve spoken to you, you may feel like they want to drag you away for a kiss. But, generally, people don’t get physical too early, even if they’re attracted to one another.

Something is up when a person wants to kiss you before you say a word. As a result, they must control themselves and watch as the date progresses.

3.    Serial Dater Doesn’t Talk About Themselves During a Date.

Even though they don’t necessarily want to get to know you, serial daters don’t care whether or not you do.

Serial daters often choose locations where they think no one they know will be, making it awkward if the couple runs into someone they know. 

A serial dater won’t’ introduce you, and you’ll probably just awkwardly sit while they talk to their friends. After the date, they don’t plan on keeping you around.

4.    The Relationship With a Serial Dater Goes Nowhere.

There are no plans for you. Serial daters move on to the next person after experiencing their high.

Are you trying hard to make the relationship progress? You are not alone in your concern.

Many people become trapped in serial dating, regardless of what they do.

It’s not your fault, and despite your efforts, the relationship will only progress as far as it already has.

5.    A Serial Dater Is Big On Gestures.

Serial daters use these gestures early in a relationship as signs of affection, but these actions are more complex than they appear.

They want to be sure that their charm and character take you, so they frequently use these gestures without reason.

Their excessive use of these gestures can identify a serial dater.

6.    A Serial Dater Often Uses the Victim Card.

People who regularly date are prone to portraying themselves as victims to elicit your sympathy.

They may always claim that their former partner harmed them and that they were in an abusive or toxic relationship, no matter the situation.

They might go to any lengths to make it appear that they are still affected by their former partner.

7.    A Serial Dater Fosters Insecurity.

Serial daters are afraid of commitment in a relationship. So instead, they maintain their options open at all times.

If your date casually flirts or bonds with others while dating you, they may be a serial dater.

It might make them feel vulnerable or insecure, in addition to making you feel jealous.

A serial dater craves attention, so you might feel annoyed by their jealousy.

8.    A Serial Dater Goes On An Extended Romantic Date.

When dating, serial daters have a range of “tactics” they can employ.

They make the dates longer by driving during nice weather or eating at a fancy restaurant.

They may also get your attention so that you notice their work and fall for them, or in other words, be impressed by them.

9.    A Serial Dater Prefers Attention.

A serial dater seeks to gather interest from multiple persons quickly. They might say they are down or low to get your attention.

A serial dater may also say a range of excuses, including “I’ve been having a hard time at work” or “My relative has a serious illness.”

However, their behavior may only sometimes be genuine. For example, they might seek your attention repeatedly.

10. A Serial Dater Lets You Know You Have a Considerable Effect On Them.

A serial dater knows how to win your affection by employing specific strategies. You’ll feel joyful if they tell you that you impact their dating life.

They might say, “You have changed me into a better person,” ‘I was lost before we met,’ or ‘I had low self-esteem before you entered my life.’

Does A Serial Dater Settle Down?

Unfortunately, serial daters are never satisfied. Because they are looking for that exciting, emotional experience, settling down doesn’t seem appealing to them.

They’re not concerned about your identity and capabilities. They look for somebody new to meet. Serial daters aren’t in love or looking for a relationship.

They’re on numerous dating apps, so there are undoubtedly several people they’re seeing. They’re not looking for a potential partner; they’re just looking for experience.

A serial dater does not settle down. If serial daters do, they cease being one.

Because serial daters love the idea of love as much as the experience, they do not settle down until they no longer desire love.

Even if a person claims to want to be in love, they are only genuinely interested in lust. It is why they’re always looking for new people to date.

Common Serial Dater Symptoms

1. They move things along quickly and want to speed things up
2. They frequently look at other people while you are on a date
3. They get bored quickly, so they change the topic
4. They talk about other dates or dating online
5. They are charming
6. The dates are brief.

What Is a Serial Monogamist?

However, you may need to familiarize yourself with this other type of person – serial monogamists.

People who are serial monogamists are looking for a long-term relationship in addition to their regular dating.

While seeking a committed relationship, they also appear to have short relationships.

It happens most of the time because they enter into relationships too quickly.

It’s possible that serial monogamists hate dating, but they adore having a lover because they fall in love quickly and are not picky about who their partners may be.

They are also quick to get into a new relationship after they leave an old one.

It differs from a serial dater in that serial monogamists are motivated by relationships rather than dates.

How You Can Win a Serial Dater

1.    Learn About A Serial Dater.

You can get to know a serial dater even if they don’t want to talk much about themselves. When you do, focus on things that you both like.

You both enjoy a specific TV show or sport. Then, you can discover your shared interests and keep talking about them to develop friendships and rapport.

2.    Have Fun With A Serial Dater.

Getting to know a serial dater requires extra effort on your part. Invite the serial dater to things they’ll enjoy, and keep the getting-to-know-each-other feeling alive.

They’re chasing a high, so make sure you have fun with them and keep the getting-to-know-each-other process going.

3.    Make Even Small Things Count.

When they tell you something about themselves, make sure it matters. For example, if they tell you about an activity they always wanted, go ahead and do it with them.

It is those small gestures that keep a connection alive.

Why A Person Becomes A Serial Dater

The Whisper dating app has made it easy for people to share the reasons they spend so much time dating multiple people.

Here are some of the most common reasons:

“I’m a serial dater because I’m terrified of getting into a serious relationship.”

“I let myself get sucked in by men who are not worth my time.”

“I have a short attention span when it comes to people, so if I get bored, I move on to find someone new.”

“I prefer to meet new people, but I don’t want them staying.”

“I enjoy first kisses and nothing else right now.”

“Everyone hurts me, so being a serial dater is easier.”

“I enjoy meeting new people. But I don’t want them to stay.”

“What’s not to like being a serial dater? Dates. Free meals.”

“I don’t want anything serious, and dating is fun.”

“I don’t want to hurt people, but serial dating matches my current needs.”

“Serial dating is acceptable to me. I will find the one through it.”

How To Deal With A Serial Dater

If you realize you’re dating a serial dater, do you cut them off or stick it out?

It depends on your feelings about the situation, so you have various options.

Serial daters change at some point, but they’re still preparing to settle down. So it isn’t a magical individual who will change them.

Even if you like the person, it may not result differently than you hoped. You should be aware of it.

My most significant advice is, to be honest and open with your partner. Have them tell you about their dating history and the qualities they like in a partner.

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